Skip to main content

Rain: the first memory

It used to be the morning. The mornings sound different. Sky is dark, and even a weekday seems to be static summer holiday. I turn and twist in the bed. Some minutes pass, in sleep, in dream. And, then I listen to the sound, ssss, ssssssss, tipppp, dhassss, all sorts of frictions, hits and touches are included in the sound. Its rain.

I go to the door. I feel invisible drops touching me. a opaque curtain of rain is covering the view. A hard, dry concrete spread all over the city looks little mystic, little painful in this rain. And, I realize even this city, which I hate most of the time for being to heartless and unromantic, seems beautiful in the rain.

I look as away as I can. I see lonely green trees, drenched in this shower. Their dark leafy appearance has new wet look. Birds caught in the rain, birds waiting at dry corners and birds daring to fly in showers. I see road, now seem as polished mahogany furniture.

Vehicles pass, conscious about applying gentle breaks and children roaming as if they are the only well-wisher of rain. People wait to have a break in rain so that they can continue their activities, yet they are those who in the morning read about rain and discuss too. It is always a double game.

I play ‘Sahela re’. song says, ‘hey friend, come, let’s sing. This is been song which we are singing for life, and will sing for lives to come.’ This is song in Bhop raag. Who cares!

A cigarette! As nicotine travels through the veins, words float in head. Hands feel restless, to make them alive on paper. I reject. I just feel my words getting wet in the morning rain, cleaned for whatever jumble of meanings they have and disappearing in the earth that calmly accept her love, rain.

I leave, rain too stops. Clouds walk away, as if they were never supposed to be here. And, everything goes on…

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Joy

i am alone, somehow at the balance of memories and dreams, some encounters with reality practically, a room for me, a laptop, movie, food, coffee, cigarettes and loneliness to get kick out of everything.... fucking nice life! missing a mate or complete loneliness!!

Why did I not feel awe for AWIAL?

                It happens that we choose we do certain things because of FOMO. That is how I ended up watching All We Imagine As Light (AWIAL). And somewhere in the first half, I realized that I should not have been movie hall to watch this move. I could have waited for it to appear on OTT or even other chance encounter. I liked the movie. I like the detailing of reality in the art form. But may be because of age, I seek an escape through the stories that I interact with, a shock to my senses, an intellectual or moral puzzle that stays with me. AWIAL contains nothing of this sort. It is a story of temporary closures, shown beautifully and marketed even more successfully. Image from internet                It has its own moments of magic, a part where we must choose to believe whether a certain character is indeed what it seems to be. The movie turns there and one of the leadin...

Neither of us were bounded to each other

I live my life through people around me. it is not like fish living in water. i have defined my life not in my own terms, but in the eyes of those who watched me for parts of my life. so whenever i was puzzled about my own self, I searched it through hearts and minds of people of my connection. am i not bounded to them? But then were days when I felt that why I am not defining myself in my own terms. I crashed whatever web of relations and unspoken bonds I had around myself. and then, in my search for myself, I netted one new web, more complex and fragile than what was before. Am I not bounded even then? I never feel that there will be any meaning or any joy which I get living for just myself. I tried such patterns and in the end realized that such eccentric life is not my way. I have my preferences, I like people of my own kind. I avoid those who are not in resonance. but still, I never live just for me, just through me. bind is not about molding decisions for someone els...